19 years ago today I became a mom for the first time. As I write this , I was struggling through the last stages of labour and delivery, convinced that somehow they lied to me in pre-natal class because I did not remember them mentioning anything about PAIN.
And then she arrived. And as the doctor held her up, I was sure she was a boy (lack of sleep + the aforementioned PAIN + the position she was held in + the umbilical cord looking somewhat male - like = boy) And then I clued into my husband saying "It's a girl, Jan, it's a girl" and my heart exploded.
See, I really wanted a girl. But all the indicators were boy. The pre-natal heart rate, my shape, all the women on my case-load (I was in social services at the time) said "You're going to have a boy". Really, I was just so happy to be having a baby, that I said it didn't matter. And I am quite sure that it would not have, once s/he had appeared. But I REALLY wanted a girl in my heart of hearts.
And she was a lovely baby (I mean, once she got over that crying thing). She has never been what I would call a girly-girl - she has a normal (read not obsessive) like of feminine things, but she has always preferred books to fashion magazines (in fact, I don't think she has ever read one. A fashion magazine, I mean. But I can't be sure.) She has never, to my knowledge angsted about weight or looks (at least in the open and to my face). I think she is beautiful. And she is smart. And she uses her brains to get by in the world, not her looks. Which is great, because looks can be fleeting, but brains are forever. She is independent thinking, has a great (if somewhat sarcastic) sense of humour (that comes from her dad) and is starting to find her way in the world of grown-up. She is a great student and a wonderful writer. She loves to read (did I mention that already?), play the piano,cook, fence and even likes to knit. She has made good choices to this point, and I believe that she will continue to do so. She has a wonderful soul. She is a good sister (even if she does torment her brothers on occasion) and the best daughter one could ask for.
So happy birthday baby girl. And I am so pleased and proud that the armful of potential that we were handed on August 23, 1992 has turned out to be such a delight.